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!DOWNLOAD EPUB ⚕ What Dementia Teaches Us About Love ♕ Dementia Is An Unmaking, A De Creation An Apocalypse Of Meaning Since My Father S Slow Motion Dying, And His Actual Death In November , I Have Been Much Preoccupied With Dementia By Those Who Have It, By Those Who Look After Them, By The Hospital Wards Whose Beds Are Occupied By Those In Advanced Stages Of This Self Loss, By The Way Society Denies It, By The Science Of It, The Art And Literature About It, The Philosophy, By What It Means To Be Human, To Have An Identity What Is It To Beoneself, And What Is It To Lose One S Self Who Are We When We Are Not Ourselves, And Where Do We Go This Is A Book About Dementia Not A Personal Account, But An Exploration, Structured Around This Radically Slowed Death Full Of People S Stories, Both Sad And Optimistic, It Is A Journey Into The Dusk And Then The Darkness And Then Out On To The Other Side, Where, Once Someone Is Dead, A Life Can Be Seen Whole Again Een prachtig boek over mensen met dementie en hun omgeving Kwetsbaar, rauw en boordevol tips over hoe wij als samenleving beter kunnen samen leven met de mensen die geraakt worden door deze vreselijke ziekte. Behold, my first read of August I decided to broaden my horizon in my choice of Non Fiction books Since I have never read anything regarding Dementia, I thought that this book would be a perfect start First and foremost, this book was difficult to read due to the intricate and heavy subject matter However, I managed to finish it in 2 days I m proud of myself, to say the least Although the first few chapters were rather slow, I got used to the style of writing rather quickly I must say that I wholeheartedly enjoyed the last half of the book It was so beautifully written and incredibly moving What s , it was insightful and eye opening I was awe struck by the author s ability to write a sensitive matter with such poise and empathy This hidden and dark world of dementia was unveiled in a different light Kudos to Nicci Gerrard. Ik had verwacht dat het vooral ging over haar ervaringen met haar demente vader, maar het is daarnaast een informatief boek over ouder worden, dementie, zorg voor elkaar, dood en rouw Een boeiend document Een ontwapenend, openhartig boek over dementie de moderne pest, de ziekte van de 21st eeuw , die als ze jou niet treft en verbant, wel iemand raakt van wie je houdt Daarom is dit ook een boek over liefde getuige alleen al de Engelse titel Wat dementie ons over liefde leert De vrouwelijke helft van het thrillerduo Nicci French schreef een persoonlijk en intiem maar ook universeel boek over haar vader die lang aan Alzheimer leed Voelde hij zich alleen Was zij er als dochter mantelzorger genoeg voor hem Nee Hij was een schim van zichzelf geworden, zijn denkkracht en geheugen waren verpulverd, hij werd overvallen door een grote donkerte en door mist Dat is wat deze ziekte doet ze maakt partners en vrienden en familie tot vermiste personen De ziekte past gewoon nog niet in ons systeem en we zijn de schaamte nog niet voorbij Logisch dat er in dit boek le en praktische cruciale vragen over onze verouderende maatschappij worden gesteld, over onze normen en waarden en over de zin van het leven Duurt het leven voor mensen met dementie langer dan zou moeten, omdat het een zware last voor henzelf en de verzorgenden wordt Zijn we dement minder mens Zonder denkkracht, spraakvermogen en geheugen Want we zijn wat we willen doen, kunnen , maar ook wie zijn geweest Die geschiedenis is verdonkerd, opgelost Gerrard bezoekt specialisten, kenners, lotgenoten, dementerenden Ze ontmoet wetenschappers die hersenonderzoek doen maar raadpleegt ook filosofen, schrijvers, kunstenaars Sommige verhalen zijn verdrietig, andere optimistisch, de meeste liefdevol Als dementie een tijdbom is, dan is die bom volgens Gerrard in werkelijkheid allang ontploft Dat klinkt wrang maar dit is een belangrijk, empathisch en krachtig boek met een open en toch ergens opbeurend want open einde. I saw this at Waterstones and luckily got a copy from netgalley, so thanks It s every bit as beautiful and well written as I d imagine it to be Nicci exposes her soul and really digs deep to personhood and what it means to have dementia I don t know anyone who has dementia, but it reads like good fiction and is philosophical She writes so well, it s a book I took my time on It s not a page turner, although I expect it shouldn t be.Despite everything, as a 36 year old, I ve told my husband my plan and like the idea of ending my life on my terms if dementia were to be my fate, as it sounded like people hold on to those who have dementia, because of them, not the person with dementia.I ve read nothing quite like it and if you want to contiplate your life and feelings about death, this is the book to do it Although there are a handful of reappearing characters, I sort of remembered who was who and if I forgot, it didn t matter What hooked me is the idyll picture of Sweden and her father that she painted in the begining She they Nicci talks about her partner being her writing partner has done a tremendous job on eloquently weaving a picture of both dementia, feelings towards it and those around it Worth a read. It is heartbreaking to watch someone special to you deteriorate in front of you on a daily basis An intelligent man become almost childlike in his behaviour and the simplest of actions now requiring the help of a carer My father was diagnosed with dementia 2 years ago and I am learning daily the depth of this terrible illness Successful author Nicci Gerrard, who co writes thrillers with her partner Sean French gives a great insight into Dementia for anyone who has not yet witnessed the illness first hand or for people like myself who deal with it daily on a personal level There were many things she talks of that are very familiar to me already and others that may help me in the future caring for my father This must have been a very difficult book to write, there is no happy ending and it is certainly not an uplifting book but for many people like me I am sure it will be not only helpful but also reassure carers.I would like to thank Net Galley and Penguin books UK for supplying a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. 3.5 4 V glad to have read this, but I think sometimes it s too lyrically beautiful for it s own good too kind generous forgiving It dives gorgeously into the sadness and loneliness and despair of dementia, but I don t think it ever quite gets a proper handle on the frustration and grossness and cesspit ness of it It s delightfully hopeful, and I imagine will be both a massive comfort and informative tool, and what she s done with John s Campaign is life changing. To witness the gradual decline of someone you love is not easy Therefore all credit must go to the author for sharing the experience of her father s Dementia journey, together with others that face similarly challenging circumstances I found a vast proportion of the narration resonated with me, which I am sure will be a view shared by many, many readers Its pages are filled with empathy and honesty and highlights that a person with Dementia, in any one of its stealth like forms, does not cease to be a person they may forget, but we will remember them The passages that show how the smallest chink of light can brighten the darkest of days are an inspiration As a result I feel a wide range of people may find some comfort in reading this bookMy thanks to the publisher for providing a digital copy of this title via Netgalley, which I chose to voluntarily read and review I found this book absolutely stunning written from the heart, drawing on the author s personal journey through the decline and loss of her father together with an immense amount of research, quite beautifully presented and written with the most vivid imagery, following the unremitting progress of the disease It begins with getting old and facing up to its presence, follows the stages of deterioration the shame of the early stages, the return to a state of innocence, together with those rare moments of joy and beauty , looks at the challenges and changing role of the carer, and then inevitably deals movingly with the end, saying goodbye, and death.I read much of this book at a hospital bedside, as my mother entering the later stages of vascular dementia fought the advance of sepsis from an unknown source, and it looked possible that she wouldn t pull through I m pleased to report that she has and her journey continues I found it immensely uplifting, the writing quite exceptional, and the love in which each page was wrapped made my solitary hours considerably bearable Nicci Gerrard really understands I marked so many passages as I read, the most perfect prose faultlessly capturing the emotion in those scattered important moments, wanting to be able to return to them later.This book draws together facts and figures, the most moving human stories, the author s personal experiences through her father s decline together with searing insights into the impacts of dementia and those who love them It draws in the importance of art and music, the creative arts fascinating and immensely moving accounts of the way responses can be evoked when words and understanding begin to fail Understandably perhaps, I responded at a particularly personal level to the chapter on carers, which looks at the way previous relationships are impacted, using both statistics and personal stories that broke my heart but the book also shines an unforgiving spotlight on the many failures in support, the great chasm between care and care , the overwhelming need to shift focus from them to us and question our collective humanity Even when memory is gone, language is splintered and lost, recognition has crumbled, and the notion of a self is hard to hold on to, there are ways to find the human being trapped in the wreckage, to hear them and to acknowledge that they are still humans, precious, and one of us Glancing at the early reviews of this book on , I m appalled by a solitary one star the comment being completely unrealistic dementia is so different in real life I know nothing about the reviewer s own experience, but I really couldn t disagree vehemently This book is absolutely true to my own experience, so very important, presenting so many new insights and perspectives with exceptional understanding I d recommend it without reservation to anyone who might be looking for an unflinching look at the human impact of dementia, moving, uplifting, and beautifully captured.